FREAKS

FREAKS

America has a fascination with freaks. Why, hell, we have a freak for a president, a DARTH freak for a vice president, and a bunch of freaks, including under-qualified freak Maggie Spellings, in the president’s cabinet. Our political system is overwhelmed with freaks and this is telling. One could say: a government for the freaks by the freaks. But not really. For we folks in CT have a super-freak for a Senator, the ever freaky Captain Lieberman, formerly Oedipus Lieberman, formerly Joe Lieberman, Democrat from CT—a freak who now wants to go to war with Iran. A freak whom I and many others didn’t vote for. Sure, there are countless other freaks. But the least said about the freaks roaming our streets, occupying high-paying positions, and dominating the entertainment industry the better. Suffice it to say, we are a freak nation.

Maybe it’s the recent summer solstice. Perhaps it’s that all the cherubs are out of school. It might be the weather. Whatever the reason, America has a freak fetish and it certainly seems to escalate with the temperature. The hotter it gets, the more humid it gets, the more uncomfortable it gets, the more the freaks come out and get freaky.

This brings me to Mann Coulter, a Rocky Horror Freak of all freaks. Yes, she’s well educated. Yes, she could reasonably (if she tried) advocate for conservative politics. Yes, she could legitimately bring something to the table aside from verbal arsenic and poisoned lace. But she’s a FREAK. A freak who appears on most shows in a...cocktail dress. A freak that can’t even be tolerated by her own side; the National Review did fire her after all. A freak who is given a mainstream venue from which to spew her venom. A freak that remains freaky by making fun of everyone, especially anyone who is a Democrat. A freak, whom Chris Matthews, a closet freak himself, invited on his show yesterday so that he could get his summer freak on. A freak who sells a lot books, who touches upon—like it or not—the American freak vibe, those deep-seated feelings that many Americans feel inside, and a freak who unequivocally perpetuates the American freak fetish. Which brings me to my freaky question: if we all know we have a freak problem, a freak addiction, and we can bring ourselves to admit to it, how do we ever set ourselves on a path of freak recovery?