COMING TO A CLASSROOM NEAR YOU: The Castle Called the Classroom

COMING TO A CLASSROOM NEAR YOU: The Castle Called the Classroom

In Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness, the European Kurtz establishes himself as a demigod among the African natives. Among these natives, Kurtz assumes absolute power. He reigns supreme. He lavishes in the worship until he recognizes that something has gone horribly wrong—“the horror…the horror.”

In classrooms all across America, teachers establish themselves as figures of authority among the students they teach. To many students, the teacher sometimes assumes a sense of power unparalleled to other authority figures in students’ lives—guardians, coaches, doctors or other professionals perhaps far more credentialed than the teacher in question. In short, there is an enormous amount of a power a teacher wields in his or her classroom and depending upon how the teacher manages that power, the learning experience for the student can be a benefit or a situation that has gone…horribly wrong.

Of course, the responsible, 1% more conscious teacher wields power with respect. S/he realizes on multiple levels how a teacher’s instruction, personality, and professionalism impact the degree to which students perform. When the door closes to the classroom, this kind of teacher takes the job seriously by adhering to the curriculum, by doing what is expected, and by making sure students learn. Unfortunately when the door to many classrooms close, these things don’t happen and this is primarily because of WHO the teacher is in that classroom.

The Kurtz teacher, a description I like to use, simply does what s/he wants. This type of teacher doesn’t wield power with respect and thus envisions the classroom—on some level—as a castle for a master of his/her domain—Seinfeld pun intended. Teachers fall into this category by either completely or partially ignoring the curriculum; by either giving the appearance of doing what is expected or simply disregarding what is expected; and/or by either barely caring about whether or not students learn—or the worst, not caring at all whether or not students learn—“the horror…the horror.”

Few people know that in education there is little accountability; once that classroom door closes, anything can happen. Teachers, even the new, untenured ones, are directly observed maybe 3-5 times during a 180-day school year. The tenured ones—another entry for another day—are observed less than that. And the sad truth of the matter is that in a school organization there’s no efficient, effective way to monitor teachers on a consistent, regular basis.

Without question, there are many excellent teachers out there who make student learning—rather than themselves, their egos and/or their agenda—come alive. However, it’s also important to note—and to make you aware—that there are far too many Kurtzs in classrooms either consciously or unconsciously abusing the power bestowed upon them in their domain.

Coming to a Classroom Near You: The Cheating Narrative

Coming to a Classroom Near You: The Cheating Narrative

Cheating is epidemic in American society. Just take look at our public figures, for heaven’s sake: Cheating seems to be a prerequisite for the governorship of New York whether you're coming or going; cheating helped curious Georgey win the presidency in 2000; bad dog Bill cheated on Hillary; and just recently Hillary attempted to cheat the media with her Bosnia “fairy tale,” got caught, and subsequently received yet another zero for this latest pathetic attempt at creative campaigning.

So it should come as no surprise that while American students might not excel in certain academic subjects, they more oftentimes than not exceed standards when it comes to cheating. And every teacher, instructor, and professor, I’m sure, has a treasure trove of stories about cheating, about those who cheat, and about how they struggled to maintain their sanity when confronting those who cheat but who also pretend NOT TO know that they cheated. Mind boggling, I know.

On the high school level, cheating is a constant in the cult of adolescent personality. And generally speaking, the “cheating” narrative ascribes to the following plot points:

1. The cheater knowingly cheats regardless of being warned a 1.000 times.
2. The cheater usually can’t help make it obvious that s/he has cheated; in short, s/he is seldom “good” at it.
3. When caught, the cheater immediately PRETENDS NOT TO KNOW THAT s/he cheated.
4. Denial sets in.
5. The cheater then finds some lame-a## way to blame the teacher, instructor, or professor.
6. The crying game happens—and I’m not referring to the film of the same name.
7. At this point, the narrative goes one or two ways:

a. The cheater recognizes the obvious: s/he has been INCREDIBLY stupid, got caught, and SHOULD NOT do this again, although chances are s/he will.

b. The cheater CAN’T abandon a win at this point and thus resorts to the ultimate act of desperation: S/he brings in a parent as a "special operations" cheerleader, as an enabler of sorts, as the ultimate “character” witness.

I regret to inform you that choice “b” is the preferred choice of cheaters and their cheating parents, which brings me to my major point: How can we educators ever expect to stop cheating when parents blindly pass on their cheating behaviors to their children whom they are cheating out of some sort of moral growth and development?

Coming to a Classroom Near You: The Homework Debate Redux

Coming to a Classroom Near You: The Homework Debate Redux

Oh, no—not again! Just when I was ready to crawl under a rock to protect myself from the stupidity of public education—I’m an educator by the way, the ever-hideous homework debate, courtesy of stupid-dome, crash lands yet again on the shores of reality. My protective rock is gone—and so is a bit of my sanity.

Those who make the case against homework claim that it doesn’t help. Rather, they allege that it detracts students from their families, from their extra-curricular activities, from their jobs, and, oh lord, from their social lives. Theorists posit that there’s no solid connection between homework and academic achievement, especially in grade school. Sure, the theorists may have a point with excessive homework at the elementary level; the little ones can only develop so fast after all. But they certainly could benefit from age-appropriate practice at home, so let’s not go crazy.

What is CRAZY is how some theorists extend their arguments to middle and high school students, who desperately need as much practice with skill development and content acquisition as possible. Certainly, any excessive and irrelevant homework assignments may turn students off, as the theorists suggest. But manageable amounts and relevant homework could certainly benefit students as they prepare for more complex learning that awaits them in college, in the work force, and in our ever-changing, advanced technological world.

Has anyone looked into how BADLY American high school students under-perform compared to students from other industrialized nations? Has anyone wondered why so many colleges and universities nowadays must offer prerequisite, developmental courses because so many “college age” students cannot test into the standard, beginning 101 courses? Has anyone considered the relationship involving the high failure rates of college freshmen, student preparedness and readiness, and the serious homework demands of an undergraduate education?

Approximately six months ago I decided to play guitar. I have weekly lessons with my guitar Sansei, who’s a great teacher and very patient soul. In order to get better, I obviously have to practice at home. It’s real simple: the more I practice at home, the better I get at guitar, and the better my lessons go. My point: my work at home matters and helps my learning.

So as I aspire to improve at guitar by doing my homework and by rocking out with my bad self, I just might be able to recover my metaphoric rock under which I must return to survive the insanity of the homework debate redux.

Coming to a Classroom Near You: Teacher Freelancing

Coming to a Classroom Near You: Teacher Freelancing

Have you heard the story of the high school student who couldn’t tell you what s/he learned in a certain teacher’s class? What about the narrative involving parents who… “teacher shop” for the teacher who actually…teaches? Why is it that students infinitely benefit more from teacher X who teaches the same course as teacher Z? And what about those students who avoid a certain teacher because…on,no!..that teacher gives too much work?

If you have answers to any of the questions above, you’ve either witnessed, experienced, and/or read about teacher freelancing. What is teacher freelancing, you ask? Teacher freelancing is rampant in public schools, and it happens more often than you can imagine and far more frequently at the secondary level.

Teacher freelancing occurs when classroom teachers basically…do what they want. The heck with following the curriculum. The heck with standards. Never mind teaching skills and content. “Do they really need to know this?” “Is this book or that book…really that important?” “Homework doesn’t r-e-a-l-l-y matter.” “Honestly, it’s far more important to be the students’ ‘friends.’” “Because it’s more important to help them realize who they are.” “The heck with all that dated ‘traditional stuff.’” Alas, the classroom as therapy philosophy rules; how kids “feel” supersedes concerns of how and whether or not they've learned.

Believe me: this approach to teaching—or any variation thereof—has sadly come to dominate the teaching profession as of late. Instead of teaching skills and content, the many teachers who adopt this approach “freelance” as therapists, as older and supposedly wiser friends, as self-help gurus, as self-proclaimed rebels without a cause, as “Kurtz” characters who fancy themselves as demigods or…-goddesses over underlings who worship them.

Look, I’m not advocating for teachers to be robots, to be void of feeling and character, or to avoid making personal connections with kids. Teachers are professionals; we are hired to do our job—to deliver an adopted and approved curriculum, to teach skills and content, to treat students respectfully as individuals, to stay abreast of research and theory, and, above all else, to make sure that students learn. Teachers need not freelance; they just need to do their jobs.

A Vegas Marriage

A VEGAS MARRIAGE

Have you ever heard the same story again and again and again, and the only difference is the person telling you the story? That’s how I feel lately as educators are having the same conversation with one another: the honeymoon period is long over with our “new” students and we suddenly realize that, in some cases, we are in b-a-d relationships. Let’s face it: with certain students, if we had the power to divorce or annul, we would squash our Vegas marriages—these bad relationships we initially had high hopes for that suddenly we find ourselves wallowing in—quicker than Britney’s been ordered to give her kids back to K-Fed—the latest mainstream media rage.

Many of the educators I know—mostly secondary and post secondary—know what I’m talking about, the reality that the Columbus Day or Fall break couldn’t come soon enough. But the break we really want is not from the teaching profession itself; it’s from our students' lame-as* excuses, which seem to get worse each year and range from the conventional, “my dog sh*t on and then ate my homework”; to the rather stupid, “ professor so-so, would you give me directions to your office because I will be late in turning in yet another late paper?”; to the truly, f*cking absurd, “even though I’ve shown up to 1 of the 10 classes so far and submitted nothing, do I still stand a chance of passing?” I kid you not.

So as we educators fantasize about “ending” our Vegas relationships with these hideous trolls; as we find ourselves routinely saying, “you can’t make this sh*t up;” as we may—especially if you’re new to the profession and an idealist of sorts—consider a “marriage” counseling intervention, we can take comfort in the saying that “nothing lasts forever” and that a Vegas marriage can end as quickly as it began.

Back to School Shock

BACK TO SCHOOL SHOCK

We’ve all been traumatized in one way or another by the back to school season—or more appropriately, the back to school shock. For us educators and our students, the unstructured days of summer are gone for two semesters or approximately 180 days. Now it’s up early, out the door only to multi-task our way through today’s episode of “beat the clock.”

But we are not the only ones experiencing shock. George W. Bush has also shown some quasi back-to-school trauma. Because as all of his fellow cheerleaders continue to jump off his Titantic better known as Iraq, George continues to steer his ship down the abyss of no return. Stunned by the fact that they don’t sell Sparknotes for his…ah…David Petraeus’s anticipated report on Iraq due to Congress by September 15th, George still believes that photo-ops, empty words, and recycled spin can save him from his pending failing grades. Sorry—but dispatching Scary Mary Matalin to Meet the Press on Sunday to begin spinning his failures doesn’t help. Poor Mary—she does fit the bill for the dreaded “helicopter” Mom, hovering over her pathetic child, making any failure of his seem not that bad.

But the sad fact of the matter is that George never prepared for his Iraq project; “project-based” assignments are all the rage in public education nowadays. He never did study enough; he and his tutor—Mr. Cheney—never did make the right preparations before, during, and after their invasion; and instead of just ponying-up to the fact that he was in desperate need of remedial help in the Geopolitics of the Middle East, arrogant George simply took the attitude that many apathetic students take when they “imagine” they have finished their work. Like the student who says, "at least it's over," George simply said: "mission accomplished. "

Classroom Realities Left Behind: Flatlining

FLATLINING

In this age of education reform, in the era of NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND, in this technologically-advanced period that geo-political guru Tom Friedman has appropriately tagged as “The World is Flat,” it’s mind-boggling how much our students DON’T know. Folks, for those of you outside the walls of public education, I’ve got a CNN newsflash. Brace yourselves. Hold tight. Crash helmets on. Get in the launch position: knowledge is out and skills are in. Yeah baby!!!

What do I mean? It’s simple: public education has sided with “skills” at the expense of knowledge. This disastrous approach starts when the cherubs are young. Memorization is de-emphasized, practically gone, replaced with the focus on…skills. The hell with multiplication tables. Screw spelling words correctly. Historical facts? And no you don’t: grammar rules? Forget ‘bout it—and that’s their excuse—the Stalinist proponents of the “skills” doctrine: why do students need to know…things??? Alas, the knowledge deficit sets in.

The truth is skill development is fine but not at the expense of developing and broadening our students’ knowledge. There are so many basic concepts that even the brightest students simply don’t know and haven’t mastered, whether it’s multiplication tables, understanding the three branches of U.S. government, or implementing the basic rules of grammar. What’s even more alarming is that the more advanced areas of learning require some basic mastery of this…stuff. Foreign languages, other cultures, different organizational systems, and global issues are what our students desperately need to know in this global economy, in the Bushie global war on terror, and in this galaxy of globalism. Thus the question remains: in this flat, flat world, why would we ever allow our students to flatline on knowledge?

CLASSROOM REALITIES LEFT BEHIND: IT

IT

Many people simply don't get "it" about teaching. Many people who teach, in fact, don't get "it' about teaching either.

What is IT that I am talking about? The non-glamorous, unappreciated, Betty Friedanesque experience that has... no... name: an "IT" factor, for lack of a better term. The feeling that a teacher who teaches knows all too well. The feeling of being overwhelmed, the feeling of never being fully appreciated, the feeling of being underpaid, the feeling that there are simply not enough hours in the day to do your job right, the feeling that you are: a data-entry clerk, a surrogate parent, a jury, a judge, a mind-reader, a cheerleader for everybody and their grandmother, an entertainer, a web master, a psychologist, a mediator, a friend, a "differentiated" instructor, a miracle worker, oh, didn't I mention also...a teacher? Call it a psychotic collage, a hyperbole, a catharsis of a frustrated blogger struggling to be 1% more conscious--call "it" what you will. I call "it" a teacher who teaches--in many instances a shadow in the American work force who has been left behind.

Teachers who teach know this, we live this, we think this, we endure this, and sometimes we don't know what to do with all of this-this "it" factor. In the spirit of Betty Friedan, this teacher who teaches can't help but wonder about the mystique surrounding all the teachers who teach: Is all this...worth IT?

CLASSROOM REALITIES LEFT BEHIND

Classroom Realities Left Behind will be posted on Tuesdays. I've lined up a number of colleagues, former students, and bloggers to submit contributions. Enjoy!

THE "I CAN'T" GENERATION

“I can’t do this work; I’m far too busy.”

“I can’t read this book. I just don’t have the time. Or the interest.”

“I can’t complete the homework assignment because it’s difficult. It was a lot. A lot of work. And my parents agree.”

“I can’t make the detention because I have a job, practice, and I HAVE TO RE-CHARGE my I-Pod.”

“I can’t own my behavior because YOU CAN’T make me.”

“I can’t pick up the bottle and wrapper on the floor because I can’t pick up my mess.”

“I can’t bring a pencil and materials to class…because I just…CAN’T”

“I can’t complete all the work on the syllabus because isn’t the college experience about independence; can’t I say ‘I can’t’ and mean it?”

Dear reader, welcome to the “I can’t” generation. This is their battle cry: “I can’t.” And while this mantra certainly doesn’t define this entire generation of high school and college-level students (I know plenty who don’t and won’t ascribe to it), it CAN define a vast majority of it.

As I reflect upon my ten years of teaching high school and undergraduate courses, I now wonder how and when “I can’t” took over. Is it part of the Bush zeitgeist of “you must be with us because you CAN’T be against us?” Is it due to a pervading sense of absolutism—yes or no, and nothing in-between? Is it because this generation’s parents dislike “harmful,” non-Oprah (I do love her) words like no, never, and not? Is it because the education system, of which I’m a part, has become hostage to the unilateral ideology that no matter what, we CAN’T hurt their already, alleged low self-esteems? Is it because should you challenge the “I can’t” battle cry in front of your colleagues you may be faced with: “How can you say that sptmck (that’s me)? I thought you were a liberal?”

Fumbling towards a more conscious state of mind as an educator, colleague, and parent who’s very concerned about the future education of all, including my two little ones, I CAN’T help wonder: CAN we leave the “I can’t” doctrine behind?